Overheard #40

Last night Stella was upstairs watching something inappropriate on Netflix. Marni was downstairs doing homework with me and Lisa.

The first question that Stella yelled down to us was "What's an ovulation kit?", which I answered incorrectly.

A moment later, a second question... "What's a virgin?"

Without even looking up from her homework, Marni yelled back at her "Someone who doesn't eat meat".

I laughed out loud and waited for it to sink in with Lisa who was on the iPad at the time. After a few seconds she looked up and said "Wait. What was that?"

Eventually I answered Stella by telling her it was someone who hasn't kissed yet.

I'm not ready to have "the talk" with her.

Overheard #39

MARNI: Daddy, was it difficult living with roommates in college? I mean, what if you were warm and they were cold in your room? Did you open the window?
DADDY: Well, there are 4 of us all living in one apartment and we all get along.
MARNI: Well that doesn't count because you're usually warm, and Stella is usually warm, and I'm usually warm, and mommy is always having hot flashes.

Overheard #38

STELLA: "Daddy, was I a (test) dummy so that you would know how to raise Marni better?"

Overheard #37

Feverish, unconscious Marni.

Marni has strep, and decided she would feel better if she slept upstairs in our bed last night. I had the honor of sleeping with the feverish little snore machine.

At about 3:30 am she awoke and asked for some water. Once she was done quenching her thirst, she decided to get all Ophthalmological on me.

What ensued was a lesson from her on how the "pimples" (pupils) in your eyes get bigger and smaller depending on the light. 

Once she was done schooling me on this topic she declared the workings of the eye "impressive", rolled over, and went to sleep.

Overheard #36

The other morning I was walking down the street with Marni. As usual, she was non-stop talking.

At one point she asked me about the black writing that you see on some trucks. She didn't like it. I eventually figured out that she meant graffiti. I told her that it was writing that some people did on other people's property, and I showed her an example on a nearby wall.

She thought for a moment and then told me it reminded her of when the Jews painted their doors with blood at Passover.

Nice observation, Marni.

Overheard #35

So I asked a group of people at Stella's BBQ, "You know what was the best present that we ever got for Stella?" To which Marni replied... "Marni!".

Overheard #34

Marni's new boyfriend from Pre-K (Ishaan) is coming over for a play date later today. They are both VERY excited about this. When asked what their plans are for the play date, Marni replied... "We're gonna say bathroom words together."

Overheard #33

The family was at a movie theater to see "Yogi Bear". Before "Yogi" started, there was a Road Runner cartoon. When it was over, Marni leaned over to me and said (about Wile E. Coyote)... "That guy never wins!"

Overheard #32

We were ordering in pizza with neighbors and trying to figure out what types of pizza we wanted. Lisa suggested a margherita pizza, to which Stella replied "Yes, a marghertia pizza, but without the booze."

Overheard #31

On our walk to camp this morning:

MARNI: Daddy, this is the restaurant that we are taking you to tonight for your birthday.
STELLA: Marni! It's a secret!
MARNI: Oh. Daddy, pause your brain so you don't remember.

Overheard #30

Homework is getting tougher for Stella and the math questions have now gone beyond ten. In order to figure out one question last night, Stella asked, "Can I borrow your fingers?".

Overheard #29

Marni to everyone while Stella drew and Marni ate at a restaurant:

"Stella's a good artist. I'm a good eater."

Overheard #28

Stella was watching a little bit of a Three Stooges Marathon with me on New Years Eve. First time for her.

After a while she turned to me and asked, "are those the Jonas Brothers?".

Overheard #27

Marni to Lisa while in the rocking chair at bed time...
"Mommy, I don't like curly hair. I want straight hair like Stella and daddy. Stella's hair and daddy's hair are perfect. My hair and your hair are not perfect. I want straight hair, and then I can marry Cassius." (Cassius is a boy at Raindrops)

Marni to daddy while holding up a note she had just scribbled on...
"Daddy, I want to give this note to the boy at Raindrops with the hat. He sits next to me at circle time. I don't know his name, but I love him. I want to marry him, but I don't know his name."

Overheard #26

This morning Marni called me "despicable".

Yes, she watches a lot of Bugs and Daffy cartoons.

Overheard #25

At dinner, Stella was recounting her exciting field trip to the New York Aquarium. Sharks! Stingrays! Walruses!

Then Marni pipes up...

"Excuse me daddy, but nothing was fun at Raindrops."

(Photo courtesy of Meike Discher)

Overheard #24 (International Edition)

We were walking around a farm in Germany and came across a gaggle of cows standing outside a barn. Stella took a look at the largest cow (pictured on the left) and said "that cow is a girl". We thought it was "utterly" understandable how she figured this out. But when we asked her how she knew, she explained, "because it has long eyelashes".

Overheard #23

Today I am wearing one of my more "flamboyant" shirts.

When Marni caught an eyeful of it she remarked, "Daddy, why are you wearing a girl shirt?"

Then Stella chimed in, "Actually daddy, you wear a lot of girl shirts."

Overheard #22

Stella, Marni and I upon opening a package of gummy candy:

Daddy to Stella: Make sure you share with your sister.

Stella to Daddy: Only if my brain says.

Marni to Stella: Your brain says!

Stella to Marni: You don't know what my brain says!

Overheard #21

Here is a wrap-up of interesting words and phrases that have come out of the mouths of our babes:

• "Humongous", both
  
• "Awesome dude", Marni
  
• "What the heck!", Stella
• "Super" (as in "super, super heavy" or "super fast"), both
• "I'm only" (which actually means "I'm lonely"), Marni